The Wednesday Profile
Full Name: Mark “Tom Petty Rules, Bob Dylan Drools” Oster
Nicknames: Marko, Moster and Rachel often refers to him as Pretty Mark.
Known Affiliations: Options Trader, Proprietor of The Union Rock Yards, Bassist for Cmn ineed yr hlp, Bassist for Wind or Ghost, Member (along with my Father and the Dad from Family Ties) of the People I Think Should Always Have Beards Club, Total Jew.
Origin of Relationship: Mark and I first met many years ago when I responded to a craigslist ad he posted (in the music section, pervs). Although I never played drums in his old band Longdistancerunner, we have been playing together in this band ever since.
Awesome Things He Does: I honestly believe at some point Mark and I have had a conversation that lasted 4 1/2 days. He is one of the manliest men that I know despite his preference for the taste of flavored vodka to beer and his addiction to cartoons. He is my number one smoking buddy. My Chicago sports team soulmate (as well as the biggest, truest and most long-suffering Cubs fan I know). He has an encyclopedia-like knack for knowing the best places to get food in the city, no matter what neighborhood you’re in or what you have a taste for. He is a gracious giver of rides. An owner of awesome t-shirts (specifically this one) and my key music advisor.
At the end of the day Mark is one of the greatest people on the whole planet and one of my very best friends. I can safely say he’ll be in my wedding party, the only real mystery is whether or not Rachel will try and snag him as a bridesmaid first (and for those who get the joke, even if she does manage to score him he will not be listed as ‘Friend’ in the programs).
Marko, you’re the best (around). And seriously, fuck Bob Dylan.
P.S. If anyone out there was expecting to get anything out of me in November/December of 2009, you may want to go ahead and ask me before this comes out.
